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net voor de start van de behandeling

Spirits

In the beginning, alcohol was a distant shore,
ut than came  anxiety, depression, misunderstandings and heart sore.
Amidst the loud laughter of parties, I would explore,
A momentary escape with strangers telling me ”you, I adore.”

Started at parties, amid laughter and cheer,
A dance with the bottle, forgetting fear.
It was just blowing off steam, I’d justify,
Intoxicated smiles were easier than a sober cry.

Then came a plague, loud, but to the eye unseen,
Confined within walls, in the world of quarantine.
The parties vanished, but the bottles stayed,
In my quiet home, the Devil remained.

Still, I saw it as a release, a soothing balm,
Words of deceptive spirits, brought the calm.
Yet when reality came knocking, things took a turn,
The fires of alcohol began to burn.

Now, the thought of leaving it fills me with dread,
For without it, how will I escape my weary head?
When I stop drinking, I’ve got no more escape goat,
To pin down my sorrows, to keep afloat. 

I see others enjoying, their banter ringing clear,
Yet, within me, I feel a void, an incredible fear.
What’s left when the alcohol can’t numb the pain?
Who am I without it, stripped bare in the rain?

The answer lies not at the bottles bottom,
But within me, in a place long forgotten.
The journey is long, the path unclear,
Yet to feel, to heal, I must conquer this fear.

*dit gedicht is met toestemming geplaatst.